me and such

I’m pretty slow at work right now, have completed all of my projects for the week and no managers are around so I have nothing new to work on. And I’m BORED! I was sifting through old e-mails the other day and found one from 2007 with one of those surveys that always used to be posted on MySpace. When I was on those social networks one of my favorite things to do was read those surveys about people- I loved it! I’m one of those people that likes to know everything about you; people fascinate me…all details included. So while sitting here waiting for the time to pass (I’m having appetizers and drinks with two of my favorite friends tonight, one who is newly ENGAGED!), I’m going to think of 15 things about myself to share with my non-existent readers.
1. I get in cleaning fits in which it may be 11 PM on a Tuesday night but I become determined to clean my entire house inside and out, right then and there
2. I love searching for lyrics to music
3. I have miniature panic attacks thinking about all of the things I want to do with my life, because I literally want to do EVERYTHING
4. I miss my family so freakin much- haven’t seen most of my them since 2003
5. Of all talents I could have, a good singing voice is one I’d want the most
6. I played soccer for about ten years- left halfback
7. I have a celeb crush on Matt Damon
8. I could eat an entire carton of fruit sorbet in one sitting
9. I came to faith in God after 23 years of struggling with it and it’s been a beautiful experience
10. I have the bestest friends in the whole wide world
11. I have approximately 20 different “dream jobs” including journalist, photographer, nurse, teacher, chef, fashionista…..etc. Sigh.
12. My boyfriend has the most wonderful smile I’ve ever seen
13. Matt and I have a short term “ideal plan” of moving to London early in our marriage, living in a humble abode and traveling everywhere possible from there before coming back to settle down
14. I love my kids that I don’t even have yet
15. This outfit is so me: (i heart jcrew)

Time is of the Essence

First of all, as an update: I just got back from volunteering and I just love it. I highly recommend it to anyone who has an extra couple of hours here and there and the compassion to share in a world that really needs it. As for the gym….that has been a failure for the past week as I’ve struggled with sleep but I was going pretty good and intend to start back tomorrow. Anyway….

While I don’t at all think that I am a love advice columnist, I happen to be having these conversations with my friends lately, and feel like writing about them! Today, my wonderful, beautiful, charismatic friend called me in tears- expressing her frustration with her and her great new boyfriend’s lack of time together. She called me, because giiiirl I can relate! She is in the wonderful stage of a new relationship, when two people realize that they just may have found THE one, and I am so happy for her. The catch is, they live about one hour from each other, so they pretty much only get to see each other on weekends. How funny- Matt and I live 2 minutes from each other, and find ourselves in the same situation. Life these days is just so fast-paced for many of us. I’m not sure in which generation the simple life became so complicated, but we all have so many commitments and responsibilities that take up so much of our time in our young lives. Hence, I think a lot of young, unmarried couples can attest to the issue of not seeing each other as much as they’d like to. Here’s why I think such a situation can be a blessing in disguise:

In relationships, what doesn’t kill you can make you stronger. I know a lot of couples, and Matthew and I started this way ourselves, that when they realize how much they love each other, they can’t get enough. Literally, they create this unhealthy co-dependence by spending every waking free moment in each other’s presence. So then…if the other person does something to upset you, the smallest thing can feel like the end of the world, because what else do you have? You do everything with that person…you find all of your joy and comfort in their presence. And when you feel less than great- who do you think will bear the burden? Not healthy.

Now, when you spend all of your time with this other person who isn’t yet your spouse, what happens to you? What about all of those things you want to accomplish for yourself, especially before you get married so that you have more to bring to the table? When do you take care of those things? Not only do I refer to careers, fitness, hobbies, tasks…etc, but I also mean emotional stability, security, and maturity. These things require growth and often some independence. Especially in today’s day and age when we go from one relationship to another (see previous blog…you like that?!) we need sufficient time to assess and reevaluate our wants and non-wants before diving back into the realm.

Being faced with this involuntary divide will force you to take your relationship slow, to give it the time it deserves to progress into the healthy and mature relationship that you want. I believe rushing is so much more dangerous than being forced to be patient. Yes, it is hard and I still struggle with it in my own relationship from time to time, because I want to see my man, darn it! But I know what he is doing is for the good of our future, and same goes for me. I also know that we have built a solid foundation…and it won’t be this way forever. I am sure that when it’s over, it will all be so worth the wait.

Love and life, actually.

Today someone said to me, “I wish that the first person I was in a relationship with was the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with”. She explained her reason for saying this as, every time we end one relationship, we leave a piece of ourselves with that person. Where else do the feelings and emotions go? It just doesn’t seem like the way it was supposed to be- to go from one relationship to another, leaving behind feelings and carrying forward scars and fears. Being single and having experienced the ups and downs of dating, she wants to approach her next relationship with extreme caution. “I just don’t want to lose any more of myself”. I thought this was a very interesting point. On one hand, we learn so much from these experiences, and ultimately these lessons better position us for the future. In a perfect world, I agree with my friend. Unfortunately, it just doesn’t work that way these days. I was lead to think about this quote from SATC,

“Later that day I got to thinking about relationships. There are those that open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that's just fabulous.”

I would love if I had been able to enter my relationship with my one and only (Matt) with a clean slate, and vice versa. I don’t have some amazing conclusion to this post, but I think my ultimate point is that it my friend is so smart in recognizing that she doesn’t want to lose herself in relationships that don’t meet the requirements for the life that she wants to live. I hope that everyone seeks out the companion that truly sets that fire in their hearts and can be a partner in this crazy journey of life!

Shout Out to Steph

I am so incredibly proud of my dear friend Stephanie Pando. She has found a way to put her passions to work, through being one of the best nannies a parent could ask for and also being able to capture wonderful moments for people through photography.

If you’re interested in having her take some photos for you (she's around Southern and Northern CA), she is very reasonably priced, as she’s a beginner- talented nonetheless! Go Steph!!! She does other pictures too (weddings, family, etc.) but there were some of my favorite.

Make it Happen.

A goal I need to seriously tackle this year is taking violin lessons. I played the violin for 8 years, and then as a teen decided I was too cool to keep playing….so annoying! I can still read music and play relatively well, but I really want to master it! Not only classical, which is what I was taught, but folk style too! I dream of playing for my family one day. And while I’ve meant to start practicing for a long time now, it just hasn’t happened.

Another one I started and didn’t finish (sigh) is my guitar…but that will require a lot more learning which I’d rather tackle after the violin. I’m slowly starting to realize that the theme of majority of my life has been “I love this, I want to try….oh man this is hard…I’m not awesome right off the bat? Ugh I’m over it”. By now, it’s really starting to annoy me. As in, I am annoying myself! I must put an end to this! I absolutely know that if I put my mind to any of these things, if I want them bad enough, I can make it happen. But I am a “restless soul” (stole that from passport in my pocket) and when it doesn’t happen right away, I must need more instant gratification or something because I just tend to get frustrated with myself and look for the next thing to try and undertake.

*I must learn to find the excitement in those challenges, though, because that’s what makes the accomplishment such a beautiful thing. You gotta earn the glory, right?!*

Ode to Sacramento

I realized that my blog has no theme at all….but I think I’m okay with that. So to add to my randomness, I decided to capture some of the beautiful things I walk past on my way to work. One of my favorite things about Sacramento is the trees. I love these tulip trees….

And we have orange trees everywhere!

The capitol building and park are so pretty- great for a picnic or to jog around.

I used to hate this city, to be totally honest, but I’ve grown to love it. With midtown’s cute shops, restaurants, and night life if you want it….downtown containing some impressive business with our state’s government and the country’s largest pension fund…and then East Sacramento with the oh so beautiful homes, parks, and “Fabulous Forties”… I’m over wishing I lived somewhere else and am learning to appreciate what I have right in front of me. That’s not to say I’m not looking forward to the next chapter in life, wherever that may be (London?? Seattle??), but I am honestly happy right where I am for now!

*** Some of my midtown favorites: The Bread Store (BEST sandwiches), Old Soul (awesome coffee spot- see pics on “Cheetah Is the New Black”), Moxie for some fabulous finer dining, Time Tested Books (used bookstore), Zanzibar (world imports/free trade store) ***

Travel Reminiscence: Cinque Terre, Italy

Today was a great day. I'm still feelin' my workout from yesterday morning, I was able to enjoy my lunch break with my man., and I am very pleased with my first math exam results....so my happy place leads me to think about one of my favorite things: TRAVEL. I'm pleased to say that I've been to some amazing places so far and there are hundreds more that I'd love to see. In 2008, Matthew and I traveled to England, France, and Italy. Our absolute favorite part of the trip was the Cinque Terre.

I can't express how beautiful these five villages along the Italian coast are (Monterosso, Vernazza, Corniglia, Manarola, and Riomaggiore). On one side you have the hills that are lined with grapes and olives, and on the other side you have the gorgeous Mediterrean ocean.

No cars are allowed into the villages, just a single train that passes through them all. There's also a walking trail that connects all of the villages ("Via Del 'Amore"). Matthew and I hiked it and there really are no words for the beauty. We scored an awesome 3 story apartment...in my opinion, renting apartments from locals is the way to go. This place was no more expensive then a hotel, and it was a fully equipped! The best part was our huge balcony, overlooking the ocean. Right below us was a selection of amazing restaurants. The fresh pasta was the kind of delicious that you have to close your eyes and say "mmm" with every bite. Oh, and did I mention the wine?

Ti amo Cinque Terre!

Healthy body, healthy mind.

Are you like me and gain weight like a mad woman if you don’t watch what you eat? UGH! I sometimes envy my skinny little friends who can eat whatever they want and not see an impact. But at the same time, it’s kind of nice to know I work hard at keeping my figure trim. While it’s definitely far from perfectly where I want it, I am at a point where I feel good enough to blog about it! So aside from the much needed- no matter how skinny you are- daily exercise, I have found some healthy eating habits that make it much easier to keep the muffin tops away. This is what works for me:
-Save your indulging for the weekends. I have to remind myself that eating is really just for our health and survival. So while I love love LOVE a delicious meal, I also can’t always eat to my heart’s highest content. But there is definitely a happy medium. For example, I create a consistent and healthy routine that keeps my body happy by eating the relatively same foods at work every day. Then come the weekend , I can let loose without the guilt!
- Pack your lunch the night before! Do it! This way you can buy things that require a bit more prep time so that you don’t have to worry about the rush in the morning (which means they are probably healthier). Also helps to avoid getting take out because you didn’t have time to pack anything
-Read labels! Avoid buying it if it’s not good for you. Just avoid having the unnecessary and unhealthy foods at your house. If you’re like me, if it’s there….you’ll eat it. And then feel guilty about it.
Suggestions (all purchased at Trader Joe’s):
-I LOVE salads. I have a salad every day at work- I mix the greens the night before at home, and leave some of my toppings and dressings at work to avoid the hassle of lugging at back and forth. My perfect salad that I am yet to get sick of consists of: baby lettuce mix, basil, Persian cucumbers (represent), shredded carrots, walnuts (super food), dried cranberries, tomatoes, broccoli, and feta cheese crumbles. I just add balsamic vinegar and olive oil. It sounds like a lot of work but honestly, TJ’s makes it really easy and if you leave the bulk of it at work and do the other part at home the night before, you’re set.
-TJ’s Heart Healthy Instant Oatmeal (blueberry or cranberry are my fave)
-Fat free cottage cheese- try it with some fruity fat-free (natural) yogurt or fresh berries! If you can’t deal with the cottage cheese, try fat free vanilla yogurt or for more of a natural flavor Greek style plain yogurt mixed with fresh berries (I love mixing with blueberries)
-An apple, banana, pear….at least one fruit as a snack
-Turkey meatballs- TJ’s sells these low fat frozen cooked turkey meatballs. They have great flavor and are a good source of protein. I just heat up a few, plain or with marinara, and eat them a la carte!
I have a lot of others but these are some of the ones I consider staples at this point. It really makes a difference not just in the way you look but the way you feel when you live an intentionally healthy lifestyle and I think it’s something everyone should try out!

Pumped.

I am feeling inspired to jazz up this blog. I am so not a jazzy person, but I love so many things and have a zillion different aspirations- that’s gotta get me somewhere, right? I’ll admit that just having a blog to come home to and write on has motivated me to seek inspiration from almost everything in life. Looking at other people’s blogs (check out Alicia’s, linked below- so cute, and with links to a ton of other cute blogs), I get fired up! From adorable outfits and accessories that inspire my own wardrobe, to great books to read, to places to eat and even sweet things to do for my bf…. I just want to do it all.. So now in addition to seeking the career I am passionate about….staying fit and healthy…and overall being the best version of myself possible, I want to challenge my creativity and continue sharing my thoughts and experiences with the people I trust and love the most!

It's Amore!

I had a wonderful Valentines Day weekend! On Friday night, Matthew made us some delicious chili and cornbread and we watched Freedom Writers. Pretty good movie, especially given that it's based on a true story, and it definitely kicked up some more inspiration for my possible teaching career. On Saturday we had Matthew's beautiful goddaughter's baptism, did some running around, and had dinner with his family at the Cheesecake Factory. On Valentines day we took my mom on a hike in Auburn near the American River Canyon, where we discovered an awesome cove and lady bugs galore! We wrapped up the evening with a fantastic filet mignon dinner and the Godfather (finally saw it!).....This morning we enjoyed coffee and pastries with some friends at one of our favorite coffee spots in Sacramento, Old Soul. This was an awesome 3-day weekend. Not looking forward to going back to work tomorrow!! But.....c'est la vie! I am so thankful for time that I get to spend with friends and family. Matthew has been so loving and sweet - well he always is- but more so lately he has been professing his love so publicly and making reference to our future. It really is a wonderful and exciting thing, to really be able to envision making a life with someone. OOOhhh la la!

Praying for the People of Iran

I wish people understood how bad it still is in Iran for the people. I am so sick of seeing the state organized pro-government rallies. This is not a true representation of the mass public. The mass public, including my educated and wonderful family wants to have their rights acknowledged and instead they are being attacked and silenced. The corrupt regime is a true shame and words cannot express the disgrace that they have caused. I pray for change, for the sake of the people. For their safety and for their lives to be without fear and oppression.

My Sweet Man!

Matthew treated me to a wonderful show on Friday night. It was so sweet and thoughtful of him, LOVE that boy! We also had a wonderful breakfast at "Dottie's"
(try it if you can- delightful), walked along the Golden Gate Bridge and hiked the coast at the Marin Headlands, and stopped in Sausalito for a stroll and coffee. It was so relaxing and great... Saturday was the hilarious comedy show- all Iranians who can should see Maz, he had us cracking up!! After two years, one of which was a serious learning curve for us, to say the least, Matthew and I are stronger than ever and soooo thankful for the experiences that have brought us closer. I hope everyone waits it out for the person who truly makes them feel they understand the true meaning of love, and that it goes both ways.

Not quite!

Well, the crazy schedule has caught up to me and I. Am. Tired. I have not at all gotten accustomed to it, not to mention, I am always hungry! Ugh. Oh well...I'll keep pushing it until it just becomes routine. In other news, I've found myself in quite a strange situation. An old acquaintance has tracked me down, and decided to tell me a bit too much information. At first this information was really sad, and I felt a lot of sympathy. Therefore, this person, who I was never close to, started to get a lot of my attention as I felt she needed a friend. Now as her stories and traumas progress...I feel confident I am being manipulated. And it is so weird. I really do not understand how some people can be so careless with other people's lives and emotions. I seem to attract a lot of these people. In a conversation with Matt regarding this situation, we pointed out that he is often told that he is very friendly, personable, well-spoken, likable...etc. Yet people, with the exception of oldies, never really impose on him or go to him in times of need. Then there is me- who often gives off the vibe (as I am told) of a less friendly, very private and intense person. Yet people have always- spilled their hearts out to me, involved me with their dramas and lives, and sometimes imposed on a lot of my time. This is not referring to just my close friends who can do that, its people who I am not close with, acquaintances if you will. I need to get to the bottom of what I do to give off that additional 'come to me with all of your problems' vibe....Not that I don't like to help people. But I think that gets taken advantage of, which isn't cool.