Hmmm....

I felt serious guilt about my last post so I took it down. Haha....

Inspiraton!

Ahhh yes, the good old blog again. I’ve realized something about myself in the past three months of craziness/awesomeness/stress/bliss. I NEED exercise for mental health. I am one of those people whose emotional stability goes hand in hand with exercise. I admittedly have NOT worked out for like 3 months… sure I’ve gone here and there a few times, but I pretty much have sucked in that department due to wedding planning, the actual wedding, random health issues, and just straight up being TIRED. But the less I work out, the more tired I am, and hence the tangled web I have weaved. I have to be cautious of my crankiness, I feel fat, and I’m ultimately just annoying myself!! My poor husband! Haha….anyway, so now I have no more excuses, I am physically now able, my wedding has passed, and I shall work out again. In fact, I must. So, as was the theme of my first blog post, here it reoccurs- I am challenging myself to stick with a five times a week workout routine, even if that workout is only 25 minutes, I need to release those endorphins!!

So yes, I suck on the blog front. But I realized that I am not one who can do the the aesthetically pleasing posts, etc. I love to write about various topics but I need to be inspired. So whether its excitement or sadness, political or spiritual, whatever it is, I would love to write about it if I have some type of qualifying event. But it comes full circle to my lack of energy from being so inactive that I’m pretty sure it accounts for my lack of inspiration towards a lot of things lately. Yes, I’ve loved creating my home with my husband, trying new recipes, new experiences with my volunteering…etc. But the Ah-Ha! Moments have been few and far between. So…

Objective: Bring back some ZING to my life
Strategy: Be active, regularly.
Outcome: Pleasant feelings and attitude, hot bod...hence increasing enthusiasm in other aspects of all.

Not feelin it!

Somehow this four-day week is taking an extremely long time to reach its dear sweet end! Today, I am happy as a clam, but had an annoying experience that I felt I can/will blog about.

Here is something about me- if I don’t want to hang out with someone, I don’t pretend that I do. If I don’t mean something, I don’t say it just to sound like a wonderful person. Because the truth is, that actions speak louder than words, in this case at least. And I have such a HUGE gripe with people who talk a big game about how much they miss you and want to hang out and make plans yet they flake on every opportunity to do so, or they never answer your calls. I can’t allow myself to believe that you’re actually too busy to just send a quick text or email, if not engage in a call. Otherwise you’d have no boyfriend, your mom would hate you….etc. etc. Right??!

I am an understanding person, trust me. I know what it’s like to be busy. But I also know that no matter how busy I am, there’s always time for the people that matter the most. And people can’t take that for granted. You don’t have friends when it’s convenient for you, that’s just not the way it works. And you can say all of the most wonderful things in the world, but until you actually start to follow through, don’t give yourself any points, or expect anyone else to. .. YA HEARD???

Okay, goodnight!!!

"Music is what feelings sound like"

Today, I plugged in my IPOD at work and zoned out the rest of the office as I worked and jammed away. There’s nothing like good music that speaks to your heart- at least for me- I just LOVE music! Some good one’s for my recently played lists:

Regina Spektor- Samson:
“You are my sweetest downfall... I loved you first”

Ben Harper and The Blind Boys- Where Could I Go
“Now I’m coming to you with my arms open wide”

Joshua Radin & Schuyler Fisk- Paperweight
“Every word you say I think I should write down, don’t want to forget come daylight...happy to lay here, just happy to be here…I’m happy to know you”

Yann Tiersen-La valse d’Amelie (version orchestra)
…this one just makes me smile!

Ray Lamontagne- Forever My Friend
“Forever my friend, forever my love, forever the woman that I'm thinking of….I just think if we keep our hearts together…Just think if we build on this trust that we have for one another…baby we can make this last a lifetime”

Happy medium

Ahhhh….I didn’t blog yesterday, because frankly I felt like crawling into a hole and never ever coming out. I had one of those days where I felt so unable to be happy and motivated…it was no bueno. I have realized something about myself. I have two very conflicting sides. One side needs to be busy at all times, I have to be working on multiple projects, I have to be taking on something new, I have to be moving….learning….pushing….then there’s another side that needs to be able to wind down. If I don’t get this time, I get very, VERY cranky. I get fussy and irritated and feel like the entire world is against me. I resent that I can’t relax, do something I enjoy even if it’s totally unproductive…..just CHILL. So I must focus on finding myself a happy medium, even if it’s just one day a week. Because just that one day of slowing down puts a break on the going going going. BUT!! Today, I received some good news, and that is that Matthew and I got approved on our very first home together! Rental that is, but given the areas we were interested in and the high supply of renters, we were surprised at how fast things were going and even got denied twice due to “kinships” J Well that’s just fine because our place is just wonderful. And I can’t wait!

Moral of the week: Have faith. Don’t worry when things are out of your hands. Just have faith.

Its good to be back

Where do I begin? I am DONE with my class, DONE with the CSET (for now), and have settled all the big pre-wedding decisions. I am elated!! I finally have a moment to breathe…..to clean….to exercise….to read….to cook…..ahhhhh it feels so good!!

Today, I feel as though I am on Cloud 9. I’m just so amazed at how good life can be. Just a few days ago I felt like I couldn’t go another day without taking a break, but I pushed through it and I feel great!

Key Takeaways:

(1) Healthy body = Healthy mind (Sleep is good. Exercise is a must. Food matters.)
(2) Don’t expect others to do things just because you would.
(3) My best friend = the world’s greatest maid of honor.
(4) Etsy.com is amazing.
(5) God is good. Always!

Random, I know. But totally true. And I get to watch LOST tonight. A-w-e-s-o-m-e!

I heart San Francisco.

Having my cousins visit SF for the first time gave us a great opportunity to be tourists in a city that we have visited tons of time already....what an awesome experience we had seeing what felt like the whole city by foot. Here's a brief of our itenerary:

Friday: Stayed at the Westin on Market- awesome location, great hotel. Shopped at Jeremys (http://www.jeremys.com/) and walked to Firenze by Night in North Beach for an amazing and authentic Italian meal. Walked around and checked out Bix in the Financial District before crashing.

Saturday: Walked walked walked. We went straight to the Embarcadero for the Saturday Famer's Market- it is so awesome! We stood in line for the well-worth-it Blue Bottle coffee, sifted through beautiful flowers and delicious looking foods, and checked out some awesome local art. We made our way to Coit Tower for an amazing view of the city, and all the way to Lombard Street- yes, still by foot. So the way to go! You run into awesome local neighbordhoods and areas, so much to see while getting a great workout! From Lombard we made our way to the Marina District where I fell in love. This is such a cute area! And the Tipsy Pig for lunch- LOVED IT. The food was great! The ambiance was amazing. Wonderful. We continued on our journey on foot to the Palace of Fine Arts. So gorgeous. Onto the shore heading towards the Golden Gate Bridge....where on our way up, Matthew proposed! Down on one knee...in front of my mom, brother, and cousins. Perfect :). This crazy day was not even over yet! We went to Maykadeh for a great Iranian dinner, and out for a drink and dueling pianos at Foley's. PHEW!!!

Sunday: Another great meal started our last day together, we had breakfast at Mo's Diner. Yummm! We headed over to Pier 31 to board a ferry over to Alcatraz. So spooky but really interesting. By the time it was over, the rain was pouring and it was time to part.

Inspiration.

Thanks to Danielle and her new blog, Life: Inspired, I got a jolt of my own inspiration for a much needed update to my blog and just to take a moment aside from my crazy work day. My mind is a whirlwind right now, so I think I just need to get some stuff OUT!

There are so many updates that need to be spread out across different posts but I can sum up the basis as "I'm engaged". YAY!! Well, what a crazy experience this has been. Immediately it has had some interesting side-effects.

1) I didn't think Matt and I could be any stronger. But I was wrong. Seeing his excitement to start our lives together and vice versa has taken our love to a whole new extraordinary level.

2)People. Are. Crazy. I was warned that people will start acting out but I really couldn't imagine this. Unfortunately, something about weddings causes a wave of irrelevant emotions to people outside of the bride and groom, whether it be pressure, jealousy, entitlement, selfishness, or what....I hate to say that off the bat I've been surprised at some people's actions. A wonderful lesson I learned today, thank you Eleanor Roosevlet: "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent".

3) That being said- I am THRILLED for our wedding and lives together, and I am SO thankful for the amazing friends and family who I have and who support and love me. It's so great to know that we have been blessed with some incredible people in our lives. Love you all!!

San Francisco was A BLAST. Thanks to Alicia, my love for SF grew exponentially, and I can't wait to go home and post the great restaurants and areas she sent us to. My proposal was truly out of a fairy tale, and now we are on a mission to plan a wedding on a very tight budget. It's been a huge but really fun challenge to our creativity and I'm excited to update my blog with our ideas and progress.

So....thanks Danielle, because I feel better already, and I think it's a sign I need "daily reflections" as you so wisely stated.

Spring Break

I can’t believe it’s already Friday….just a weekend before my time off from work ends. Depression! But San Francisco hasn’t even started yet, and that’s amazing/ has been comically challenging. First off, Matthew took us to Monterey (for my surprise trip) on Monday and Tuesday. We stayed at one of the best places I have ever stayed- Sanctuary Beach Resort- PHENOMENAL. It’s on a gorgeous and oh so clean beach surrounded by wildlife preserved areas, so it’s private, quiet and beautiful! Each room is like its own bungalow, we had just one neighbor, a fireplace, and our own patio right on the sand. We even got our own golf cart to ride around! Thanks to Matt, we enjoyed the Monterey Bay Aquarium, 17-Mile Drive, Moss Landing, Carmel and Pacific Grove. So relaxing and nice.

Now as we await to be united with my cousins arriving in San Francisco, it has not been so smooth, and I really hope that changes. The weather is supposed to be rainy the entire time they are here, they missed their flight, and now my brother’s flight has been delayed. So instead of having the full day we planned for today, we won’t even be all together until this afternoon. We hope that rain doesn’t throw all of our fun plans out the window….. BOOO! BUT I will keep my head up and am very excited for the wonderful food and scenery on our itinerary:

EATS and DRINKS:
-Swan Oyster Depot
-The Tipsy Pig
-Café de la Press
-Mo’s Grill
-Rex’s Café
-Firenze by Night
-A16
-Maykadeh
-Foley’s
-Circa
-Bix

SHOPPING
-Union Street, Chestnut Street, Octavia Street
-Jeremy (LOVE this place, like the Ross of higher end retailers)
-Maiden Lane

SIGHTS/AREAS:
-Alcatraz
-Palace of Fine Arts and Presidio
-Golden Gate Bridge/Park
-Coit Tower and Lombard Street
-Ghirardelli Square

P.S. That second to last picture is a leafy sea dragon (sea horse). Crazy little guy!

Dance, dance, dance

A comment from my bestie inspired me to do another post, even though I’ve unintentionally taken a sabbatical from my blog lately. There’s just WAY too much going on these days! With my class, volunteering, bridesmaids duties times TWO and my family coming to the U.S. in just one week, I’ve been busy busy busy! Life is great right now. I have SO much to look forward to. I never got around to taking pictures of my sofreh, because (a) I had like 75% of the items for it and (b) I am a crappy blogger. PLUS all of my family who reads this was away so my blog got no love (I can’t blame anyone, it’s in need of some serious juice). Anyway, we did have a great Norouz! It’s always so funny when I get together with Iranians, such a difference from when I’m with non-Iranians. Both are beautiful for their own reasons. For example, when I’m with my non-Iranians, we end up doing lots and lots of talking. When with Iranians, lots and lots of DANCING! It’s hysterical. Check out my mom’s friend trying to teach Matt how to Persian dance…..

Food + family = LOVE

Like most weekends, this one has gone by way too fast. We were able to spend time with loved ones, enjoying great food and company. For Matt’s sister’s birthday on Friday, we had an old fashioned family dinner and games night. It was a blast! We played Jenga and it was so funny how much it stressed out the grandparents! Matt’s mom is such a phenomenal cook. She prepared coconut shrimp as an appetizer…..barbecued salmon made on cedar planks topped with mango salsa….mashed potatoes….and wilted spinach salad. SO DELICIOUS! Wonderful weekend with wonderful people. Love.

Happy New Year!

The Iranian New Year, Norouz, is the first day of Spring (March 20), so it’s right around the corner, which means there are traditions to come- starting now! The preparation begins with a major spring cleaning, the purchase of new clothes, and the purchase of flowers. Another tradition is to set up a “sofreh haft seen”, which literally translates into seven items placed on a table or table cloth. These seven items all start with the letter “s” and have a different significance. We’ll get to that later, as I set up my very first sofreh of my own! In the mean time, I am thrilled to have excuses to do a mass sweep up of my house, including finally taking down the clothes that I never wear but keep “just in case”, buying more of my “daring” and fun outfits, and buying pretty and fresh flowers for the house!

While, I have a strange love for zinnias, I think the tradition typically leans more towards tulips or hyacinths.

And as far as clothes, I'm going search for items that include things like....ruffles, which I'm totally obsessed with right now (top from J Crew).... waists like this skirt from Anthroplogie...and girly dresses (Anthro again)




Anyway- I am looking forward to setting up my sofreh and spending time with loved ones to celebrate!

Dare to be bold.

So thanks to some fellow bloggers who have lit up my inspiration to brighten up my wardrobe, I made my first step this weekend. I bought an outfit from J Crew that I would not previously had the guts to try pulling off. It's bright with colors that don't conveniently match but I'm going to wear them together....funk it up with some accessories and rock it. When I was in New York with my bestie, we hung out with our fashion forward friend who struts it like no other in the city. I'll never forget how she encouraged us to be daring with our wardrobes, after we told her that we loved her outfits but didn't think we could pull them off ourselves.

"Girls, it's all in your confidence...and if you don't feel the confidence, then ROCK it like you do, and you'll look hot!"

I love the mustard color and the ruffles of the top....and the elastic band on the skirt coupled with pockets calls for a flattering fit. I also ove the big navy flowers!

Now, to pick the shoes...I think I've narrowed it down to four. Any takers?

So, what does that make me?

I think I have split personalities??

One of my identities has opinions that I want to live by, regardless or not if society agrees with them, and this is the identity that I hope defines me. These strong opinions include such things as…I don’t want a fancy life. I want to work hard for everything I ever have- whether it be my home or my family. I want to earn it by working hard every single day. And when I get that house, it doesn’t need to be some huge fancy house. I just want it to embody me and my future husband (Matt, duh)….our character, our taste…I want it to be comfortable, clean and unique. Like...we love the idea of searching for second hand furniture. Not only would it be us doing our part in conserving materials but we think you can find some really beautiful and high quality pieces that just aren’t quite as available today. I also don’t want a flashy diamond engagement ring. To me, the traditional band is beautiful because of what it represents. These days, when a girl says she is engaged, most people’s first response is, “Let me see the ring!” Really? How about- “It’s amazing that you’ve found a LIFE PARTNER, someone you love and want to build a life with!” I don’t want to get caught up in the image side of that, I want to celebrate the union and I don’t think a ring should be a part of that celebration. These are examples of the kind of life I want and hope to live.

Occasionally my other side kicks in. Why on earth do I get so easily caught up in the ooohs and aaaahs of wealth, bling, and the societal definition of success? I’ll be honest; there are certain diamond rings that make me stare (like the one above....seriously?!). In fact I tried on even just a band with diamonds on it and couldn’t help but love it. Does that mean I’m buying into these standards of society? Certain homes (like the one my friend and her loaded NY trader boyfriend live in) make me feel slightly….envious… Saying that just makes me cringe! I can’t help but sometimes daydream about that sort of glamorous lifestyle. While I definitely try to keep myself in check with what I feel is in line with my priorities and expectations, which ultimately lead me to a simple and modest lifestyle, I guess I can see how people can get so caught up in the glitz and glam. I suppose there are people who can juggle both and props to them. I just hope that I always stay honest…and true to myself. I don’t want to get swayed by the lifestyles and choices of others, and I hate that sometimes I do! Oh life- you tricky little devil you!

Oh, Paris!

Thanks to Alicia for cheering me up, I've decided to post some more pictures from my Europe trip. This time....Paris. I don't care if it's cliche or not, I LOVE this city. How could you not? It's so beautiful, as a sample of our picture below will hopefully allude to. I must admit, we were just so delighted to pick up a fresh and amazing baguette from a vendor on the street and snack on it was we walked along the artistic and charismatic streets. There is SO much to see here, and no part of it is overrated.

Blah blah blah

I tried to make a cute blog post about things that I love but it was a mess. It didn’t flow, it wasn’t cute...wasn’t feelin’ it one bit. While I love looking at those kinds of blogs and have the artistic ability like at home (do-it-yourself-esque), I cannot translate any of that into a blog post. I look at all the blogs that I like to follow and I envy the authors’ abilities to make such a visually appealing blog with cute and great ideas whether it be fashion or décor, or whatever else. The only time I am really able to get going with a post is when I have some kind of epiphany or great conversation with a friend. Unfortunately, these things do not happen on a regular basis and I am left with nothing to post. Sigh….Ideas?

On another note, I’m having a not-so uplifting day, in which the panicked thoughts and stresses of “what am I going to do with my life” are at the forefront of my mind. I did make it back into the gym this morning after one week of being sick followed by another week of laziness, so that’s a good thing. But other than that, I can’t seem to strip my brain of worries and questions about how my career is going to pan out, and when. NOR can I think of a way to add some WOW into my blog in progress. Grrr.

Hope, faith, and love.

Isn’t it funny how life turns out? My friends and I have talked about how when we were in high school we figured we’d simply just go to college, get a good job, and then get married and settle down. But we never really thought about how we’d get there. Never did we think about the fact that we may not know what that good job would be, or that there is often a very wide gap between what we’d love to do and making money to do it. Then there’s marriage…did we expect that our spouse would just walk up to us in the grocery store, in the strawberry isle, and ask us out? And it would all fall into place from there? On top of all this, we must have figured that by then we’d have a nice little saving account set up for that house…the bills…and whatever else this life requires. It’s funny how now we realize that every single one of those things require work. Lots and lots of work. From compromising, to prioritizing, and making sacrifices…. You never really plan on those things but they are all inevitable. At least for most of us. But the point isn’t to be a downer. My point can perhaps be summed up in this quote:
“The universe can dream a bigger dream for you than you can dream for yourself.”
Don’t let the realities of this life set you back, just be prepared that it may not always look the way you expected it to and embrace it! The attitudes with which we approach things can be the most significant driver of how they turn out. I’m someone who really seeks to figure things out in advance, and when things are up in the air I stress myself out trying to think them through. But it hardly ever pans out the way I thought it would anyway. I’ve found great peace in relying on the plan that exists for me, so long as I do my best to rejoice in all that I have and approach every day with nothing but hope, faith, and love.

me and such

I’m pretty slow at work right now, have completed all of my projects for the week and no managers are around so I have nothing new to work on. And I’m BORED! I was sifting through old e-mails the other day and found one from 2007 with one of those surveys that always used to be posted on MySpace. When I was on those social networks one of my favorite things to do was read those surveys about people- I loved it! I’m one of those people that likes to know everything about you; people fascinate me…all details included. So while sitting here waiting for the time to pass (I’m having appetizers and drinks with two of my favorite friends tonight, one who is newly ENGAGED!), I’m going to think of 15 things about myself to share with my non-existent readers.
1. I get in cleaning fits in which it may be 11 PM on a Tuesday night but I become determined to clean my entire house inside and out, right then and there
2. I love searching for lyrics to music
3. I have miniature panic attacks thinking about all of the things I want to do with my life, because I literally want to do EVERYTHING
4. I miss my family so freakin much- haven’t seen most of my them since 2003
5. Of all talents I could have, a good singing voice is one I’d want the most
6. I played soccer for about ten years- left halfback
7. I have a celeb crush on Matt Damon
8. I could eat an entire carton of fruit sorbet in one sitting
9. I came to faith in God after 23 years of struggling with it and it’s been a beautiful experience
10. I have the bestest friends in the whole wide world
11. I have approximately 20 different “dream jobs” including journalist, photographer, nurse, teacher, chef, fashionista…..etc. Sigh.
12. My boyfriend has the most wonderful smile I’ve ever seen
13. Matt and I have a short term “ideal plan” of moving to London early in our marriage, living in a humble abode and traveling everywhere possible from there before coming back to settle down
14. I love my kids that I don’t even have yet
15. This outfit is so me: (i heart jcrew)

Time is of the Essence

First of all, as an update: I just got back from volunteering and I just love it. I highly recommend it to anyone who has an extra couple of hours here and there and the compassion to share in a world that really needs it. As for the gym….that has been a failure for the past week as I’ve struggled with sleep but I was going pretty good and intend to start back tomorrow. Anyway….

While I don’t at all think that I am a love advice columnist, I happen to be having these conversations with my friends lately, and feel like writing about them! Today, my wonderful, beautiful, charismatic friend called me in tears- expressing her frustration with her and her great new boyfriend’s lack of time together. She called me, because giiiirl I can relate! She is in the wonderful stage of a new relationship, when two people realize that they just may have found THE one, and I am so happy for her. The catch is, they live about one hour from each other, so they pretty much only get to see each other on weekends. How funny- Matt and I live 2 minutes from each other, and find ourselves in the same situation. Life these days is just so fast-paced for many of us. I’m not sure in which generation the simple life became so complicated, but we all have so many commitments and responsibilities that take up so much of our time in our young lives. Hence, I think a lot of young, unmarried couples can attest to the issue of not seeing each other as much as they’d like to. Here’s why I think such a situation can be a blessing in disguise:

In relationships, what doesn’t kill you can make you stronger. I know a lot of couples, and Matthew and I started this way ourselves, that when they realize how much they love each other, they can’t get enough. Literally, they create this unhealthy co-dependence by spending every waking free moment in each other’s presence. So then…if the other person does something to upset you, the smallest thing can feel like the end of the world, because what else do you have? You do everything with that person…you find all of your joy and comfort in their presence. And when you feel less than great- who do you think will bear the burden? Not healthy.

Now, when you spend all of your time with this other person who isn’t yet your spouse, what happens to you? What about all of those things you want to accomplish for yourself, especially before you get married so that you have more to bring to the table? When do you take care of those things? Not only do I refer to careers, fitness, hobbies, tasks…etc, but I also mean emotional stability, security, and maturity. These things require growth and often some independence. Especially in today’s day and age when we go from one relationship to another (see previous blog…you like that?!) we need sufficient time to assess and reevaluate our wants and non-wants before diving back into the realm.

Being faced with this involuntary divide will force you to take your relationship slow, to give it the time it deserves to progress into the healthy and mature relationship that you want. I believe rushing is so much more dangerous than being forced to be patient. Yes, it is hard and I still struggle with it in my own relationship from time to time, because I want to see my man, darn it! But I know what he is doing is for the good of our future, and same goes for me. I also know that we have built a solid foundation…and it won’t be this way forever. I am sure that when it’s over, it will all be so worth the wait.

Love and life, actually.

Today someone said to me, “I wish that the first person I was in a relationship with was the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with”. She explained her reason for saying this as, every time we end one relationship, we leave a piece of ourselves with that person. Where else do the feelings and emotions go? It just doesn’t seem like the way it was supposed to be- to go from one relationship to another, leaving behind feelings and carrying forward scars and fears. Being single and having experienced the ups and downs of dating, she wants to approach her next relationship with extreme caution. “I just don’t want to lose any more of myself”. I thought this was a very interesting point. On one hand, we learn so much from these experiences, and ultimately these lessons better position us for the future. In a perfect world, I agree with my friend. Unfortunately, it just doesn’t work that way these days. I was lead to think about this quote from SATC,

“Later that day I got to thinking about relationships. There are those that open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that's just fabulous.”

I would love if I had been able to enter my relationship with my one and only (Matt) with a clean slate, and vice versa. I don’t have some amazing conclusion to this post, but I think my ultimate point is that it my friend is so smart in recognizing that she doesn’t want to lose herself in relationships that don’t meet the requirements for the life that she wants to live. I hope that everyone seeks out the companion that truly sets that fire in their hearts and can be a partner in this crazy journey of life!

Shout Out to Steph

I am so incredibly proud of my dear friend Stephanie Pando. She has found a way to put her passions to work, through being one of the best nannies a parent could ask for and also being able to capture wonderful moments for people through photography.

If you’re interested in having her take some photos for you (she's around Southern and Northern CA), she is very reasonably priced, as she’s a beginner- talented nonetheless! Go Steph!!! She does other pictures too (weddings, family, etc.) but there were some of my favorite.

Make it Happen.

A goal I need to seriously tackle this year is taking violin lessons. I played the violin for 8 years, and then as a teen decided I was too cool to keep playing….so annoying! I can still read music and play relatively well, but I really want to master it! Not only classical, which is what I was taught, but folk style too! I dream of playing for my family one day. And while I’ve meant to start practicing for a long time now, it just hasn’t happened.

Another one I started and didn’t finish (sigh) is my guitar…but that will require a lot more learning which I’d rather tackle after the violin. I’m slowly starting to realize that the theme of majority of my life has been “I love this, I want to try….oh man this is hard…I’m not awesome right off the bat? Ugh I’m over it”. By now, it’s really starting to annoy me. As in, I am annoying myself! I must put an end to this! I absolutely know that if I put my mind to any of these things, if I want them bad enough, I can make it happen. But I am a “restless soul” (stole that from passport in my pocket) and when it doesn’t happen right away, I must need more instant gratification or something because I just tend to get frustrated with myself and look for the next thing to try and undertake.

*I must learn to find the excitement in those challenges, though, because that’s what makes the accomplishment such a beautiful thing. You gotta earn the glory, right?!*

Ode to Sacramento

I realized that my blog has no theme at all….but I think I’m okay with that. So to add to my randomness, I decided to capture some of the beautiful things I walk past on my way to work. One of my favorite things about Sacramento is the trees. I love these tulip trees….

And we have orange trees everywhere!

The capitol building and park are so pretty- great for a picnic or to jog around.

I used to hate this city, to be totally honest, but I’ve grown to love it. With midtown’s cute shops, restaurants, and night life if you want it….downtown containing some impressive business with our state’s government and the country’s largest pension fund…and then East Sacramento with the oh so beautiful homes, parks, and “Fabulous Forties”… I’m over wishing I lived somewhere else and am learning to appreciate what I have right in front of me. That’s not to say I’m not looking forward to the next chapter in life, wherever that may be (London?? Seattle??), but I am honestly happy right where I am for now!

*** Some of my midtown favorites: The Bread Store (BEST sandwiches), Old Soul (awesome coffee spot- see pics on “Cheetah Is the New Black”), Moxie for some fabulous finer dining, Time Tested Books (used bookstore), Zanzibar (world imports/free trade store) ***